In the Flow with Healing Waters
Recognizing when you’re open and closed
As I reflect on my week, it has been a pretty heavy one. It’s been heavy as my family is going through lots of changes. Raising teenagers, post covid, just normal teenage stuff, not sure what it is. Just feels heavy.
As I was on a walk today, I noticed how I was feeling. I was down, unsure what to do next, and just feeling heavy. I also noticed I didn’t want to wave, let alone smile at anyone who was driving by in my neighborhood. It was curious to me.
I have talked about this in my meditation classes. Why is it easier to go from open to closed versus closed to open? Feeling heavy is closed. Feeling confused and frustrated about the situation is closed. I also know what it feels like to be open.
Then why does it feel so hard to go from closed to open? My students all recognized that it only takes a second to feel bad, but also agreed it feels as if it takes so much more work and energy to turn it around to feeling good again.
While walking It feels as if I waved at people as though nothing is wrong, I felt like I was lying. Maybe that is why? I definitely don’t like to be inauthentic. I also don’t like to be closed. But sometimes I still do.
Why do we close to the people we love? Why can’t we just be open all the time? I am still figuring it out. As I was frustrated at my teenagers decisions, I am trying to teach open and closed; as I look back as I was clearly closed. It is humbling to say the least.
On my walk, I recognized that as well. Taking space is such a healing time. Space to see what part I had in the conversation. How do I want to show up next time? How can I be open when the next decision my kids make feels like it sends me over the cliff?
I could beat myself up, but I don’t (too often). I sometimes ask “what did I do wrong?” but that question quickly fades as I know I have done the best I could. It’s all about turning it around. On my walk, I had time and space to turn it around. I came back home, texted my son and said I wanted to support him differently. He must have had time to think as well, because he responded differently as well.
I think that is the key to going from closed to open. How can I turn it around for me? I didn’t like feeling like I did, so I simply turned it around.
This concept is in our upcoming program “The Perfect Triangle” which has SO much good information. Denise and I started 3+ years ago developing this program for a friend who wanted it for her business team. We then realized how helpful it was not only for the business world, but for the everyday world. We are so excited to present it to the world! It’s getting VERY close.
Even after 3 years, it amazes me how even when I KNOW this information, I get caught up in the moment and respond the way I don’t want to respond. But I am human. I don’t get down quite as long and each time a situation happens I get to change the outcome. That’s growth!
Keep growing-
in the flow-
Susan
