In the Flow with Healing Waters


What are you paying attention to?

There are some people who we cross paths with who forever leave a mark. I have been blessed with several individuals who I admire and who have in some way changed who I am. One of those people is Tajuana. I met her at a personal growth program I went to several years ago. We all came in as strangers and developed close friendships and some strong bonds in a short time. I follow Tajuana on Facebook. She describes herself as a “Cultivator of Self Kindness”. In many ways she reminds me of Denise who is another person who inspired me and changed who I want to be, and how I want to show up in the world.

Tajuana recently had a post on Facebook. She started it by saying “Today is my 56th birthday and I am going to get in as many things as I can in three minutes.” She shared bits of her wisdom. I found her wisdom interesting and useful. I sent her a text and asked her permission to use some of her quotes in a blog. She said, “Of course,” so I will share some with all of you.

1.      What you try to control actually controls you.  Sit with that for a minute. I mean really think about it. What is it in your life that you are trying to fix and control? Is it even yours to fix? That is an important question to ask yourself. 

My first husband was an alcoholic. I spent hours, weeks, months, and years trying to fix and control him and I failed miserably. I could write a novel on the negative emotional and physical impact it had on me. The bottom line is it was never mine to fix. I had no control and that made my life feel out of control. Energetic issues with control can have a negative impact on the gallbladder. We divorced when I was 36. I had my gallbladder out at age 37. I remember the Dr telling me I did not fit the picture of someone with gallbladder problems. I now have a good understanding of what went wrong because I understand how energy works in our body. Sometimes we spend a lot of time being annoyed or aggravated with someone for a variety of reasons. The reasons are endless but the bottom line is most of the time it is out of our control. Yet we are willing for the sake of wanting things our way to compromise our happiness and joy.

2.      You need to pay attention to what you are paying attention to. Where are you putting your attention? Energy flows to where our attention goes. Do you focus on the negative things you hear on the news? Do these negative things create fear for you? Fear causes our energy to contract. It can cause us to worry, make it difficult to make good decisions, and even make us impatient to name a few. Are you paying attention to all the places you go that you get poor service, or do you focus on the server that made your experience pleasant? Do you pay attention to all the naughty things your children are doing, or are you appreciating all the things they get right? What about your spouse or significant other? Do you pay attention to all the bad drivers on the road? Are you paying attention to all the things you have to be grateful for? Are you enjoying beautiful sunsets? Spring is almost here. Will you pay attention to the new leaves growing on the trees, the flowers and plants coming back to life, the warm sunny days? How much attention do you give to your cell phone? Where we put our attention is a choice.

3.      You Find what you are looking for. If we have a tendency to put our attention and focus on negative things that is what we will see. It becomes a pattern and a habit. We do it subconsciously. It’s like when you drive to work everyday in heavy traffic. You get to work and complain to your co-workers about all the people out there that don’t know how to drive. It aggravates you and the next morning is the same thing. You see the bad drivers everyday because you are looking for them. You may have people in your life that are a challenge for you to deal with. More than likely you are only seeing their faults because that is what you are looking for. If you have an attitude that “nothing ever goes right for me” you may be looking for all the things that are not going right. Energy flows where your attention goes.  Putting our attention on positive things will help our energy flow to positive. What does that mean for us? It means we get to live with an open heart, happy and joyful. When we are trying to fix and control, and paying attention to the negative, we find the negative, and it steals our happiness and joy. It contracts our bodies energy and potentially causes illness in our body.

4.      You are the light. Yes, each of us is the light so let’s all go shine our positive and loving lights to make this world a better place.

I want to thank my dear friend who enlightened me and gave me some food for thought. I’ve got some things to work on.

Shining my Light in the Flow,