In the Flow with Healing Waters
What does love mean to you?
What does love mean to you? What does unconditional love mean to you? At first glance, we believe we love others and are loved. The unsettling fact is most love we share is transactional. I love this person when they do what I want, behave or look a certain way, or believe the way I do. One of the most obvious examples of this I have seen lately is when politics comes up in families and friend circles. Your sibling, friend, or parent is suddenly a terrible human and not worthy of your love because their political opinions are different from yours. You are triggered by their beliefs and eliminate them from your life. Is that love? How about your neighbor whose religious beliefs are different from yours? Their God doesn’t look like yours. They must certainly be going to hell. Is that love? I could go on with examples, but you get the point. So, what does unconditional love look like?
- Love without expectation.- You love someone just because they are a living being. You don’t expect love in return, although you would welcome it. Their belief systems and opinions are theirs and you do not feel the need to defend or persuade them to yours.
- Healthy boundaries- You are open. You feel able to say “no” to what you are not comfortable with. You can support them without creating dependence. Your stability is not contingent on them.
- You can freely express yourself. This is a feeling of trust. You are safe in expressing thoughts or opinions without fear of judgment.
I encourage you to look at the way you love others. This is not to be confused with liking someone. We all have people in our lives we choose to love even if we do not always like them, including ourselves. Are you modeling the love you would like to receive?
If you are still having difficulty with this concept, I encourage you to think of a pet. Animals can be prime examples of unconditional love. Do they care if your hair is a mess? That you have bad breath? Whether you are Democrat or Republican? Nope, they just love YOU. All of you, just as you are.
If you find yourself struggling to love others openly and without conditions, look at that, really lean into it. Where does that come from? Are you afraid? By understanding the “why”, you can begin to shift your heart. Heart-opening meditation practices are a tool that can help with this also.
“Love without emotional safety is just attachment.” – Unknown
“Love doesn’t discriminate; it embraces all beings, reminding us of our shared humanity.”- Bell Hooks
Loving in the unconditional flow,
Lisa