In the Flow with Healing Waters

Text sign showing I Love Who I Am And What I Do. Conceptual photo High self-stem being comfortable with your job Written on some colorful sticky note 4 pens laid in rank on jute base

Self Talk

Most of us have had moments where we say negative things about ourselves, to ourselves. When we do negative self talk the ramifications can lead to long lasting feelings of not being good enough creating a pattern that doesn’t serve you well. In addition to self sabotage, we also have social media where others can, and will, give their two cents on anything and everything, even if you didn’t ask for it. Often, these comments are critical, shaming, disrespectful and rude. If we aren’t feeling particularly good about ourselves, one negative comment can burrow into our brain and you believe it to be true. 

Learning to love yourself can be difficult, because we may not want to appear self centered, but that’s not what this is about. This is about feeling good in your body, loving yourself for the perfect imperfections, and being the best version of you. I believe that stepping into taking your power back of who you are and being grateful can shift how you feel about yourself. You have the power to change things if you don’t like them and to accept what can’t be changed. Some things will be easy to change and others come with a challenge. There is always growth and support with any challenge. 

My siblings and I were able to experience first hand how beautiful loving oneself is. Our mom had a major stroke when she was 45 years old. It left her paralyzed on her right side and with a very limited vocabulary. Of course, she had days that she felt down, discouraged, and tired, but overall, she had courage, a positive outlook, and the ability to see through her disabilities as abilities to do the best she could do. There were many times that she would hold her paralyzed hand in her working hand, kiss it and tell her hand that she loved it. She wasn’t defined by her stroke, she embraced it and loved herself, despite her body not being able to perform “normally.” Another time, we were in a parking lot getting ready to go into a store. She saw a person walking with a cane and felt so sorry for them. At that point, she had declined enough where she was mostly in a wheelchair. She was empathetic and didn’t see herself as “handicapped.” It happened several times that she would rearrange her furniture. Picture someone who only has use of their left side, moving their furniture and grandfather clock! She had limitless boundaries and was thankful for what she could do. She  was an inspiration and role model to all who met her. She showed us how to love yourself even when your situation isn’t optimal. 

This is just one example of loving oneself, but can apply to any situation when you talk poorly about yourself. Are you grateful for what you have, even if it’s not what you want? Can you change it or accept it for what it is? It’s okay to have moments where you feel discouraged and to recognize that things aren’t as you’d like, but talking negatively to yourself isn’t going to encourage anything hopeful, kind or supportive. You can always find something to be thankful for. It’s a change of your mindset and a new way of being. 

Here’s your homework. Stick a piece of paper on your bathroom mirror that says, “What do I love about myself today?” Start each day by naming 1 thing you love about yourself. Notice how you feel when you say what you love about yourself. Do you believe it? Maybe you’ll say the same thing each day until you start to believe it.  

Love yourself in the Flow,